I F**King Hate People!

8929399302_5b10da7eb2_qI do. I really really do.

So i’m writing this at 22:35 (yesterday). I’ve been awake since 03:00 (yesterday). It was a work thing. Which i think i mentioned in a previous blog (HERE). Yeah i did… So i’ve been awake for… some hours now… Okay you figure it out because my brain can’t do more then one thing right now, and right now it’s working on this bloody blog.

Yes, i hate people. Not like you or anything, i mean i don’t know you that well, you might be fun, great wonderful. But then you might be an asshole, like me, but not my kind of asshole. You’re just your kind of asshole.

So right, when i say i hate people, i mean, lots of people, in a place. Getting in my way. You see in bars, you just expect people to be getting in your way, at the bar. Waiting five deep, pushing your way to the front to get served by a bar twat who doesn’t care that you just want to get the fuck away from the bar because some guy just stuck his hand in your pocket thinking it was his. Yes, you’re jammed so close together i can feel the breathe of those behind me while they talk. In my ear. On their iPhones. SHOUTING!

HEY ASSHOLE, IT HAS NOICE REDUCTION. SO THERE IS NO NEED TO SHOOOUUT!“.

I hate people. Lots of people invading my calm.

Okay, i get a bus to work and home from work. But between the bus stop and work, i have a twenty minute walk. ‘Ish. In the mornings, on my way to work the only part of this walk that annoys me is, Oxford Street (London). I fucking hate walking on Oxford street. The thing is i seem to be the only person on Oxford street who looks and, adjusts, for other people. If i see someone coming towards me, i adjust my angle of ‘Walk’, to miss this person. Even though this person hasn’t adjusted to miss me. I’m a nice guy. So i move around that person. And then have to do that all the way down Oxford street until i leave, Oxford street. I hate that people step out in front of me, get in my way and stay there like i don’t exist. Like i wasn’t walking. I sometime, while in a shitty mood, kick the bottoms of their feet as i walk, “Hey, asshole, you got in my way. So this is totally your fault“, I don’t care while in that mood. And i get into that mood when assholes get in my way. But the journey is pretty bare. Going home, that is the real adventure.

Like i said up there, my walk is about twenty minutes. To work is fine once i leave Oxford street. Going home however…

It’s 19:00, I’m leaving work, i start my walk. My long walk of “GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY WAY!“. It’s not usually until i get to Regents street that i run into problems. Because this is where all the crowds are. Mostly tourists. There is this area near Carnaby street, there is a bike rack, a post, and a public toilet (Not a place you wonna go by the way) between the bike rack and the post there is a small gap, then the toilet. This is a public walk way, so way do people stand there, right between the post and the toilet. Meaning i would have to make a decision: Do i walk in the road and go around the bike rack. Or do i push my way through the assholes blocking my (public) path………..

Man, i got seriously distracted by all the shiny shiny the interwebs has to offer. Check previous blog post, (Game of This is Fucking Hilarious…). I think you’ll forgive me.

Where was i, oh yeah. My misery starts there, at Carnaby street. From that point on i’m dodging people who don’t, or can’t (Heads buried in smart-ass-phones), look where they are going, i meet a never ending, forever coming, stream of people whose smartphones are more interesting then the pavement they walk upon. Their faces buried in their phones, lit by the magical LCD screen of opportunity. This little glowing box they hold in their hands tells them everything they would ever want to know about their friends. Like, who had what for dinner. Who is sitting next to whom on the bus. Who has just slept with whoever, i don’t give a shit, behind blind bitches face. Fact is, they are all walking in a public, crowded place, yet they are not looking where they are going. And i’m the one who has to, FUCKING MOVE, out of their way. I’m looking where i’m going so it’s seems it is my responsibility to move. Thought i have to admit, sometimes i don’t. I just shoulder barge them. It seems to get their attention, you know, reminds them that they are not alone on this public walk way.

But Oxford street, at 19:10’ish, is like running the gauntlet. Yesterday, on my way home i purposefully barged into to someone. Yes i know, i’m a bad person (Asshole, remember), but i didn’t give a shit at this point, i mean why the fuck should move when the cunt in front of my won’t. I mean, i move a little, you move a little. That’s just the way it works asshole. If i move and you don’t. Then we gonna hit. Of course i have done the math before hand and knew we would hit, so i prepared my shoulder. Lets just say he turned around due to the impact, and i didn’t.

Oxford street is a nightmare for someone just trying to get to his bus stop. It’s over crowded, and everyone is walking in a different direction and at different speeds so it’s hard to anticipate where people want to go. So i find myself stopping repeatedly, getting more and more annoyed. wanting to hit people and not caring if i bump/hit people hitting them hard enough to turn them around or knock them over. Far as i’m concerned, “you shoulda been looking where the fuck you were going. I do, and i watched you walk right into me.”

I hate large crowds of people. Especially when they aren’t looking where they are fucking going, and getting in my way as i try to get home.

I. HATE. PEOPLE.

Then of course, there are those that frequent my store… shop… whatever. But that’s another story.

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