I kinda feel lost right now.
Okay, it might be stupid to those of you that don’t/didn’t like Star Trek, but Spock was one of my first scene hero’s along with Kirk and McCoy (Bones). My whole life i’ve loved Star Trek. It’s been the one constant in my life, and every few years i re-watch the original series, The Next Generation, and Deep Space Nine. Plus the first six movies.
One of my best friends, John whom i met in college, used to spend our college days doing no work, just talking about Star Trek, day after day. You never really know how much of an impact someone has on your life until they are no longer there to impact it. You get that sense of, “But, what now?“. And right now, that’s where i am. I feel lost.
Today has been a shitty day. I couldn’t get any writing done, so i decided to read, only to read sentences over and over, unable to concentrate on anything i laid down and tried to sleep, but i couldn’t even do that. Then one of my nephews started to play his R n’ B music, which i fucking hate. So i decided to go out of a walk to escape the bad music. I took my sisters dogs with me. The walk and the dogs utter naïvety about the world at large cheered me up. When i got home i was cheered up, i’d escaped that funk i was in. Something to remember when it comes back.
I open up my computer and go to Google+, and it’s plastered all over it. #RIPNimoy. I think it bullshit, as i usually do when i see similar hashtags, so i do some checking. And yep, sure enough, it looks like Leonard Nimoy finally succumb to his lung disease. And then that feeling of being lost hit me. Spock can’t die!?
I put on anther Clash record, Sandinista, i made a vlog, and i’m writing this blog. I’m doing the things that i know how to do, the things that occupy my mind, because if i stop doing this, if i stop working, my mind will just fixate on Nimoy and that funk will return like a Klingon Bird of Prey decloaking and it’ll start kicking my arse.